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Bush declares war on Economy

After several months of meeting with his top economic and military strategists, President George W. Bush gave what many consider his last important press conference, in which he formally declared war on the American Economy.
As the president stated earlier today, “The economy has been slowly stealing jobs from Americans, hitting them where it hurts most. [...]

[ More ] May 10th, 2008 | 3 Comments | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

USA to outsource presidency

In the 2008 US presidential race, each candidate has taken a hardline stance at protecting American jobs against the looming threat of outsourcing. The candidate should have spent a little more time protecting their future job–the presidency of America. Congressman Ron Paul (R-TX) introduced legislations today that would require America to outsource the job of [...]

[ More ] February 24th, 2008 | No Comments | Posted in 2008 Election |

Clinton urges wives and girlfriends to exchange sex for votes

That Hillary Clinton is one of the most well known and influential women should come as no surprise. Finally, a true test of her power has arisen–in response to news that her lead all over the country is slipping, the New York Senator has urged fellow women to withhold sex from their male companions until [...]

[ More ] February 4th, 2008 | No Comments | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

Obama to Nation: Once you go black…

Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama is starting to offer American voters a new reason to vote for him–his life long record of satisfaction. Obama spent most of today campaigning for Super Tuesday and introduced a new speech. In it, he details his long sexual past, in which he has fully satisfied women of all races [...]

[ More ] February 3rd, 2008 | No Comments | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

National Escort Service endorses Hillary Clinton

In a Democratic primary that is becoming increasingly focused on endorsements, Senator Hillary Clinton finally has one she can brag about–from the National Escort Service. The organization states it has been providing fairly priced, intimate loving for 20 years and many of its workers said they were able to relate to Clinton.
“Don’t get me wrong, [...]

[ More ] February 1st, 2008 | No Comments | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

Edwards to America: PSYCHE

When John Edwards announced today he was dropping out of the Democratic bid for presidency, media pundits everywhere wasted no time is predicting which of his former rivals he would decide to endorse. The real twist came late this evening, when he finally decided to endorse his candidate of choice–himself.
In fact, it seems Edward’s was [...]

[ More ] January 30th, 2008 | 1 Comment | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

Obama: New Hampshire is Racist

Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama surprised his followers in today’s losing speech when he reprimanded New Hampshire voters: “I think it’s pretty obvious what went on in New Hampshire. Voters didn’t agree with my skin color”. Although initially shocked, the media responded with overwhelming agreement.
MSNBC has announced it will run a week long special called [...]

[ More ] January 9th, 2008 | 3 Comments | Posted in 2008 Election, Politics |

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